Online Dating: The Return Policy - Middle Chicks

I admit it. I haven’t had a date in over a year. You might wonder why, or what’s wrong with her, and my answer would be nothing! I decided to spend time getting to know me again and loving myself. But, I sometimes get that itch to get back out there. So, what can you do when you are almost 50 and want to date? If you don’t have people lining up to set you up, then it’s online dating as the only option.

I’ve gotten plenty of advice over the past year about online dating. Try, that’s the only way to go (if you want 100s of guys who are shirtless or holding a dead deer or a fish contacting you), swipe with Tinder or try Bumble. And, I have also been told that the younger guys seem to like older women, which is another article for another time!

For me, it’s not about who is available to date, but what to do once I’m on that date. I’m not sure I know how to make small talk, and more importantly, I’m not sure I can date without getting sucked into the ‘love me and want me’ syndrome that I seem to have had in all my other relationships.

It probably doesn’t help that 2 out of 3 of my marriages started with online dating.

Online Shopping vs. Online Dating

When you shop online, you are always taking a risk. It might not look like the picture, fit right or even show up in the mail. It’s a risk, but the rewards and the ease of online shopping are so worth it, right? I love the thrill of UPS ringing my doorbell. I love the excitement of opening the package and seeing what I bought in person for the first time. And, I love the ease of just logging on and shopping anytime I want without ever having to leave the comfort of my house. The reward is so much greater than the risk.

Online dating is similar. You can shop anytime you want from the comfort of your house. You are taking a risk every time you place an order, and when you meet someone, you never know if what you saw is what you are going to get. But in online dating, is the reward greater than the risk? The return policy is a much higher price to pay than just the cost of shipping.

Online Dating Return Policies

These dating sites make a fortune from poor schlubs like us who are looking for love in all the wrong places when we think they are the right places. I think they should have a return policy. If what you order ends up misrepresenting themselves, you should be able to get your money back!

Think of the years wasted, tears spent, pounds gained or lost, gray hairs, wrinkles, anxiety, depression, anger, frustration, humiliation, time, money and just general shit from one bad online relationship of pure misrepresentation and being tricked and fooled. I want to be able to return the merchandise with no questions asked and the same ease of online shopping. Put that sucker in a postage paid package and ship it back to where it came from!

Just think how much more business the dating sites would attract if they had a return policy like most stores that accepted returns unless it was a final sale item? Every store has rules, so if you are still on a dating site for over two years, then you must go on sale because there has to be a reason you are still on there. If you are purchased as a final sale, just like in an online store, no returns. You know you are taking a calculated risk, but for the low low LOW sale price, you have to figure why not, right?

I bet more people would consider online dating if some of these sites had a good return policy. Perhaps there could even be a “try it before you buy it feature,” or would that be asking too much? Well, a gal can dream, can’t she?

Photo Credit: joykelen Flickr via Compfight cc